Spera In Deo; Hope In God

       For the first time in many years, I walked around Hope College's campus with a book bag around my shoulder.  Snow was on the ground and as the students passed by me their breath was expended into the atmosphere.  Everything was very different about me walking campus this time.  This time I was an outsider (to the students).  I was a lady and not a girl.  I was observant of their interactions.  Some were laughing. Some were holding in depth conversations.  Some were trudging through the slush filled walkways holding hands of what they probably believed or hoped to be their future spouse.  There was magic.  There was Hope.
      I had time to travel through some of the buildings that hold my heart so close.  Eight years have passed since I've wandered those hallways, auditoriums, used the secret restrooms and corridors as to avoid an abundance of traffic.  I still know some navigating tricks for campus. The students look so young to me.  I referred to them earlier in the day to a collegue as "the kids".  I shocked myself a bit with that statement.  Kids...
      I imagine there a certain magic present on any college campus.  Young adults soaking in knowledge and developing into their own individualistic ideals and personhood; it's an environment unlike any other.  I do think there is a certain quality about Hope College that makes that entity stand out amongst the rest; SPERA IN DEO; a spirit of hope in God.
      I was a bad student while I attended Hope.  I focused the majority of my energies on deep, philosophical, and theological conversations with my peers, softball, and the youth ministry I was involved in.  Though I did not place my efforts into my grades like I should have, I did absorb and crave every ounce of character development that the atmosphere at Hope had to offer.  I entered into the world post-grad with one of the best things I could have; firm knowledge of who was and am.  The last 10 years since graduation have been filled with challenges; ups and downs.  I have had a plethora of professional experiences that have opened my eyes to humanity and the world in which we inhabit.  I've loved. I've been crushed.  I've faced some barriers that looked like mountains that I would never be able to summit.  I've felt defeated but never hopeless. SPERA IN DEO.
      So why was I wandering around the familiar but ever evolving campus that I love the other day?  Despite my lack of focus on my studies at Hope, despite some of my personal war stories, I was highlighted as the Arts and Humanities featured alumna for 2015 for their Arts and Humanities Day.  I was asked to come and speak to Arts and Humanities students because of my degree in Religion and my work over the last 10 years.
      I had a very beloved person in my life ask me the other day if I thought God had forgotten about her.  She has been disillusioned with the Christian religion for many years.  The weight of the question that has plagued her for so long wore on her face in that moment.  I told her that God never forgets us.  It can feel like He's left us for a period of time but we are never forgotten.  I told her that at my most distant and lowest times in my faith walk, God has ironically used me the most.  The times I felt the most worthless, He reminds me that I am somebody to Him.
      10 years ago if someone would have told me that I would be a featured alumna and speaking to students at Hope regularly because of my professional accomplishments and passions, I would have told them they were drunk and to go home! 2 years ago I would have said, "Don't screw with me. You're insane".  1 year ago I would have said, "I'm not useful.  I not someone that could be something like that even if I was given the chance".  SPERA IN DEO.
      Those seemingly impossible mountains were summited and not on my own accord.  God never forgot about me.  When we place our Hope in God, when we are able to look beyond ourselves to our Greater Power, we can do seemingly impossible things.  One of the most amazing and wonderful things I've been able to do in my life is give back to Hope College, in part, what they gave me.  May we all hope in God and know and feel that we are never forgotten.

            SPERA IN DEO.